Going the Extra Mile

This time last year I was taking daily train rides into the city from my daughter's place. I had uprooted our pets and myself and moved in with her and her husband since my husband was moved to an acute rehab facility away from our home.
 I went to see him everyday.
My sole focus everyday was him.
From the train I had to walk close to a mile to get to his location. I did this in the cold, snowy months of February and March.
Everyday.
Sub zero temperatures, wind, ice, snow, melting snow-slush, walking back and forth, sometimes running to catch the train.
I took home his dirty clothes. I brought back his clean clothes that I freshly laundered after I got home.
And I sat with him.
 I followed him to physical therapy and watched each session.
 I learned how to hook up the feeding tube.
I read him his mail. I read from the Bible. I read from books.
 I encouraged.
 I did my hair and makeup and brought a cheery disposition.
 I made sure he brushed his teeth.
I emptied urinals.
 By his side.
Bills piled up and I had to take care of those.
If he asked for it, I bought it.
 I took care of everything without complaint.

This last time he was in the hospital changed him. Changed us. Changed our lives. Changed my life.

This time last year I was supposed to go to Atlantic City for the election board convention. I don't really have to go but it's a nice perk. I get out of the office for 4-5 days and I don't have to cook. I have a room and some time to myself. I may learn something. But more than anything, it's a break

from my life.

Last year I couldn't go because I was doing  the hospital thing. This year I can't go because of my life.
As I said, our life has been changed.
My husband is more dependent on me. He is less mobile and he doesn't drive anymore. Emptying urinals is now part of my regular routine. As is helping him with lots of other tasks that require my assistance including helping him with a shower.
I couldn't leave him. He needs me.
And sometime, in the future I may find it very difficult to work and leave him home alone for long periods of times.
I don't know.
"For me to live is Christ."
These word are found in the Bible and also in a song I'm singing in church this week.
I guess this is what you call -fleshing it out.
Living a life of faith is living a life of sacrifice.
I guess I just thought my sacrifice would be for more than one person or wouldn't involve so much......
sacrificing....ha ha
We're so naïve.

March10, 2016